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What It Takes To Make A Relationship Work

Relationships
When we think of relationships, we usually think of a relationship that is based on what we consider to be love. Its these type of relationships that make us happy when we feel we are in a mutually loving relationship. To be happy in a relationship means that the relationship is working for both people in it. It also means that both parties have to work or do that little extra that it takes to make a relationship successful.

When we first meet someone if there is a spark and attraction it gives way to the possibility of a relationship. So we start to see the person and a relationship develops. It’s fair to say that all relationships seem to be great in the beginning. We do what it takes to get the person fully interested in us hook line and sinker. We try to impress the person of our desire and are on our best behavior. But once we are in the relationship for a few months we don’t feel like we need to impress the person any more. Our good behavior starts to fade. Familiarity starts in between the two people. They let their guarded behavior down and become closer as they get to know the real person each one is. It’s now official they are a couple.

When the good behavior ends and the real selves surface so do the quirks and odd behaviors that each party has. In fact some of the behavior you once thought was cute and funny isn’t anymore its now annoying. You are both at the point now in the relationship where familiarity breeds routine. This is where a relationship either maintains for the long haul or falls apart. You see the person as they really are and they you, and you decide if you really love this person enough to make it forever.

Always remember a successful relationship is based on two people working together. It won’t work if one does all the giving and the other does all the taking. You have to know when to give and you have to know when to receive. Also both people have to have enough compatibility to make it work. If you are not compatible its like putting oil and water together they just won’t gel no matter how hard you try to make it work.

One thing that is crucial along with respect and affection for each other is united vision. Even if some of your interests are different you both have to have the same idea on where you both want the relationship to be and where you want it to go. You have to be a team. Its thinking as a team of two that will make a relationship a successful one. If you both work together and are on the same wave length to make your relationship the best it can be for the both of you then it should be a successful one.

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Focus on your mental and emotional side to gain self improvement

Self improvementNot everyone believes this but the emotional and mental aspects of a person, when combined, leads to better self improvement.

Emotions love to dominate our actions and reactions, even though we do not want it to happen sometimes. The society often see emotions as a sign of weakness, so people are used to putting them aside and focusing on the rational aspects more and more.

No matter how strict and logical you may be, you will always feel. One way or another, someone or something will get through you.

Positive emotions are a lifelong goal for many of us concerned about emotional health and self improvement. What is more important; the amount of money you made during your life or the times you laughed out of sheer joy?

People tend to put their positive emotions behind their negative feelings. This is one of the biggest problems that people come across during their lives.

There is no clear way to ignore a negative experience and try to replace it with a positive one. Life just does not work that way.

For example, when you were a child, if your goldfish dies, you would be heartbroken. Your parents will probably buy you another goldfish but the sorrow is still there.

Things get even more complex when you become an adult. A fight with your spouse the night before will affect your entire day. You will go to work angry, tired, and your mind will wander. On the way home from work you will not notice the sun shining and you would not be tempted to stop at a roadside stand to pick up some fresh fruits and vegetables.

All this because that one negative thought has contaminated the way you perceive the reality around you.

In this moment you will realize finding a safe place to relax your mind will do wonders for your emotional and mental improvement.

That place is relatively easy to find. It can be an actual place or an imaginary location. The best idea is to totally lose yourself in it.

Let us say you have a problem on your mind and it just would not go away. Go bowling. Do not know how? Just give it a shot.

Get caught up in the game. Your mind will drift away from the negative thoughts that dominated your last hours or days and start processing a whole new kind of information.

A safe haven can take many forms. It can be a song, a movie, even a person or animal. The main thing is allow yourself to get completely involved with this new activity.

You might still get flashes of the problem every now and then. Ignore it and get even more absorbed in what you are doing.

When the bowling game, the song, or the movie ends you will abruptly return to reality. You will probably want to retreat back to the safe place. Do not do it.

The safe place exists only as a helping hand, not as a solution to your life’s problems, may it be a small or big. It serves only as an escape route.

You will return from your safe zone with an increased energy level. You will feel better about yourself and gain more confidence. You will see that any issue can be resolved.

This is how a small escape from a harsh reality can increase your emotional and mental health. Try to do this often and you are on your way to better self improvement.

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What is Anger Management?

What
Anger is an emotion experienced by kids and adults alike. When something or someone interferes with an individual in a negative manner, it can cause them to become angry. Anger is a normal response to such a situation. However anger can be classed as a mild or intense irritation. Depending on the individual, the circumstance and their emotions, anger may cause a person to become enraged or even furious. People who become angry behave in different ways. Some lash out or become extremely defensive. Other people tend to keep their anger to themselves, bottling up their negative emotions and hurt. While some people become reckless and even abusive. Anger can be a terribly harmful emotion if it isn’t controlled.

Controlling anger is considered anger management. The first step to controlling anger issues it to admit there is a problem. Some people have major anger issues but cannot see it. Naturally something happens to set a person off making them angry. Individuals, who have trouble admitting to their anger and accepting responsibility for their actions, often play the blame game. They have difficulty seeing the situation as being their fault. There’s always something or someone to blame. Their fits of anger are always blamed on something else. These people could really use a few lessons in anger management. However they need to accept their actions and reactions for what they are, anger.

Many people who have anger issues find it demeaning when anger management is suggested. Unable to accept their problem prevents them from seeking the help they require. If a person continues down a path where they are constantly angry and acting out, it will eventually cause major problems. Without anger management this individual will likely experience loss, loss of their family, loss of their job and loss of their own identity.

It is essential to convince the person with anger problems, anger management is not meant to be a punishment but rather to help them have a better quality of life. Anger management is designed to help the individual work out their problems, help them figure out why they become so angry. It also teaches the person not to be enslaved by their emotions, their anger. Anger management is meant to teach the person techniques which prevent them from getting angry as often or for very long.

There are all sorts of anger management strategies. There are programs created specifically to help those with anger issues. These programs are broken down to address different people, kids, teens, adults, couples and families. These anger management programs are in place to teach or help people to work on their anger. Teaching people strategies for working out their problems and controlling their anger are important in anger management.

Anger may be a healthy, normal emotion but when the anger takes over an individual’s life making them destructive and violent, it’s a big problem. Not only does the anger destroy the individual but it also impacts everyone and everything around them. Anger management could change this individual and ensure a healthy, normal life.

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Anger Management Tips to use in Stressful Situations

Anger_managementII
There are anger management tips which people can used when found in stressful situations. If there is a friend or family member who is easy to talk to and understanding, it might be good to talk to them. When an individual becomes angry they are incapable of seeing the other side of the problem. Talking to someone may help them by sharing their side of the story. The friend or family member may be able to help them sort through their issues and make them look at the situation from the other side. This anger management tip may work well for some people.

When an individual is dealing with anger issues, usually their emotions evolve when put in stressful situations. If a difficult incident pops up, often their only way to cope with it is to put up their defensive side. Becoming angry is probably easier than dealing with the circumstances. This is unfortunate since anger doesn’t solve anything. Once it subsides, the problem is still there.

Another great anger management tip is to write down thoughts and feelings during a fit of anger. The angry individual may feel as if nobody understands or cares about their problems. Sharing may only cause extra conflict. Lashing out will get them nowhere. Writing or journaling may help people with anger issues. Without anyone to talk back or object to what they have to say, it may be help to get their feelings off their chest. Using writing as an anger management tip may also help in the future when trying to find the triggers which cause the angry outbursts. Being able to look back over the information written may provide the person with reasons for their anger through reading about similar incidents.

Taking a vacation, spending some alone time is another good anger management tip. Removing oneself from the environment which seems to frustrate and irritate them may be a wise idea. Being able to get away and reflect on their actions may help an individual to look at things differently. Given space and time may be positive for a person with anger issues.

Some people suggest prayer and meditation as anger management tips. Both of these suggestions involve very personal practices for an individual. Given a chance to pray and be alone with one’s thoughts is a good way to release tension and let the pressures of life wash away. Letting go of feelings of anger and negative thoughts would definitely make a positive change in a person’s life. Through prayer and meditation a person is able to dig deep into their minds and souls for answers to their problems and comfort for their broken spirits.

There are lots of anger management tips which people can practice when the going gets tough. Tips such as breathe deeply, exercise, get more rest, get out in nature, find humor in the situation and play or listen to music. These are all recommended as anger management tips for the person who finds themselves in stressful and confrontational situations.

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Live longer by coping with anxiety and stress

yogaonthebeach

A person suffers from stress and anxiety for so many reasons. It may start from small and simple things but the effects can be serious. There are also ways in order for one to cope up with it. And we all know we will live longer by coping with anxiety and stress

1) Fear is anxiety
Anxiety is a fear of something. One who is anxious feels apprehended. Anxiousness of a certain person can be different from another person’s feeling uptight.

2) Set yourself free
For some, traveling via air or sea can cause anxiety. Fear from things will stop you from exploring yourself. There are some classes that you can enroll at to help you overcome your fear. Think of it, overcoming your fear is like gaining freedom.

3) Beware of the signs
Some symptoms can be sudden movement, muscle strain, headaches, dryness of the mouth, sweating, trouble in swallowing and pain in the abdomen. These indications can occur with hasty heartbeat and breathing, sexual problems, bad temper poor concentration, low energy and diarrhea.

4) The positive side of stress
Stress can be from one’s negative notion or different circumstances that make the person feel anxious, discouraged and angry. On the other hand, stress is a normal thing that one faces almost everyday.

Given its negative effects, it can be good sometimes if it is moderate because it can make a person feel motivated and help one to become more effective.

5) Scary stress
If you face too much stress, it can affect your health physically and mentally. Such things are heart disease, different types of infection, depression, and unusual and fatal diseases.

6) Farewell to a loved one
Losing someone you love can be very painful. A person’s grief can become more serious. You should go out and entertain yourself. Avoid having idle moments. Think of the blessings that still comes your way. It is good to divert your attention to different activities such as sports, hobbies, joining clubs or whatever things you may be interested in.

7) Stress at work
A job can also be stressful. You probably have a lot of deadlines to meet and too many responsibilities. Never forget that you also need to give yourself at least a few minutes of relaxation. During break time, you may do some stretching and breathing exercises.
After office hours, you could go out with friends and co-workers and just have a good time.

8) From crisis to suicide
Financial crisis is one of the causes of stress especially in third world countries. Some suffers from hunger and then depression. Their financial situation eats them and sometimes they kill themselves and even their husband, wife and kids thinking that it is the only way to get out of their mess.

If you find yourself in this situation, it would help if you will communicate with your loved ones. Tell them how you feel, what you are thinking and ask for advices. If you think it is not enough, you may also seek professional counseling.

9) The sick becomes more sickly
A patient’s physical and mental condition can be affected when they learn that they carry dreaded diseases. They may worry too much and might cause the disease to worsen and consequently slim the chances for survival. You may help a sickly patient by telling them positive things and stories of survival.
Remember that what is inside a person’s mind and how one feels is reflected on the outside. So, always smile and think positive. Keep your cool and set yourself free from unhelpful thoughts. Live healthy, happy and live longer.

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A quick guide to stress relieve

aquickguidetostressrelieve
In a hurry to get back to your work and starting to feel stressed out? Here a quick guide to stress relieve.
Do you know what is causing it?
Some people do not even know that what they are feeling, are general symptoms of stress and anxiety. They simply believe that they are overly tired and one night of complete rest is sufficient for them to get back on their feet. You should know what the common symptoms of stress and anxiety are. If most of them have already manifested, it is highly possible that you are indeed suffering from this condition.
If so, the next thing you should do is to determine what caused it then make the necessary adjustments to alleviate the situation.

Are you ready for lifestyle changing effects?
There is a good possibility that it could be some specific aspects of your lifestyle are what is causing you to experience stress and anxiety. Too much obsession on work and partying too hard are common sources of stress and anxiety. And obviously, the best way to get rid of them is get rid of the source.

All you need is some sleep
Studies reveal that in most cases, sleep is actually the best answer against stress and anxiety. Adults generally need at least eight hours of restful sleep everyday. Napping every few hours or so do not count. When the human body is unable to obtain the needed hours of sleep, it tends to act abnormally and it is why people who lack sleep are usually more emotionally high strung as well.
The only way to conquer it is to confront it!
If phobia or a traumatic event in your life is what is causing you to experience extreme stress and anxiety then the only way for you to survive it is to directly confront the source of your nightmares once and for all. It is reasonable to have fears, yes, but what is not reasonable is letting fears control your life. Remember however that this method applies to stressful but relatively harmless situations like conquering your fear of open spaces. Conquering hydrophobia is another matter entirely as directly confronting it will mean exposing yourself to the risk of drowning.

Escaping is not always bad
As long as you’ e not running away from your problems, escaping to take a breather once in a while is not at all bad and it is quite good in reducing the amount of stress and anxiety in your life. If your work, for instance, consumes almost all of your time and thoughts then it is extremely necessary for you to take a one hour break at least two times a day just so you can relax and clear your mind bit. Let the pressures simply flow away. You will see that you will be able to think more clearly afterwards.

No man is an island
And though some may say otherwise, it is true in this case. Having a friend or relative to help you out is never a bad thing to have. Sometimes, we need other people’s support to conquer problems in life and that is not something to be ashamed of, contrary to what others may seem to feel.
Be Careful of How You Obtain Stress and Anxiety Relief
If you have noticed, most of the techniques discussed here are natural ways of combating stress and anxiety relief. It is alright however if you wish to obtain relief through medication but be aware that you could suffer from side effects. Whichever way you prefer, good luck!

I hope this quick guide to stress relieve was helpful.

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10 Tips for Stress Relieve

Stress relieve

For longevity stress and anxiety should be managed and reduced as much as possible. Sometimes you get pressured from a lot for the work you do. Here are 10 Tips for Stress Relieve and managing anxiety.

1. You can put write down the things that you do when you are overwhelmed or satisfied. You may set a time frame for the things you need to accomplish. You may mark those things after you have accomplished the tasks. You may also divide by category the workload you need to finish. Make the work a little easier to do by dividing them into chunks and do not push yourself to be pressured in doing the work with limited time.

2. Do your tasks by making time slots for each piece work. Prioritize first those that have near deadlines. Focus more on doing the work than thinking how you will finish it. You will feel relaxed and comfortable doing the next tasks after you have finished your first task.

3. Focus on one task at a time. When you are anxious about finishing the tasks that need to be done can bring you stress and anxiety. Reduce stress and anxiety by motivating yourself that you can do the work easily without even being pressured. So put off all thing that can disturb you, facebook, mail, telephone etc.

4. Reduce the stress and anxiety by learning how to manage your energy. You have to think wisely on how you can categorize the lesser important tasks and those very important ones. Save your energy to those workloads that may need a lot of effort and avoid using much of your energy to low-priority tasks.

5. You may seek help from friends. You could also distribute the workload and delegate the responsibility if you cannot accomplish it on time. You may hire a helper or a baby sitter for your children if you feel you are always under pressure.

6. It is important that you should reward yourself for finishing any work. This can help a lot in reducing stress and anxiety. Always acknowledge the work and the effort that you gave for a job well done. Take a little time cherishing the prize you owe yourself before you do the next tasks.

7. Do not rush yourself on the next task that awaits you. This can create a lot of anxiety and stress. Organize yourself first and prepare the things that you will need for the next tasks. Once you are ready, do the next tasks the way you have started your first. You now have the idea on how to start and how to finish a task no matter how difficult it can be.

8. It is important for you to have a break time during your works. You may take time for a cup of tea, water the plants or take a walk at the lobby to release the anxiety made by long hours of working. You may also take time to relax at your seat and make some stretching and deep breathing. This will help you in reducing anxiety and stress.

9. It is advisable that you exercise every day to keep your body active. Exercises have been proven to relieve the body and mind from tension.

10. Give yourself a short vacation after you have finished a stressful work. Assess yourself on the things that you can improve more. Ask yourself about the things that you may think would make you anxious and stressful. Sometimes things are not that serious that you become more pressured and anxious.

Life is wonderful that it should not make you stressful. Always find ways to help your body and mind relax. You do not have to look for complicated methods, even the simple things that relax can help you reduce anxiety and stress.
Hopefully these 10 Tips for Stress Relieve help you become even more wonderful!

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